Age is just a number...an elusive one at that!

This afternoon I utterly and completely forgot one of the most basic things about myself.  I forgot how old I was.  Now I suppose this is understandable as I just had a birthday about a week or so ago, so it's a new number to remember.  You know, just like how we are never able to remember to write the correct year on checks after New Year's Day...back when we used to write checks, that is.  But not only could I not remember how old I currently am, I couldn't even remember how old I was before my birthday.  I was actually running numbers in my head that were even in the wrong decade (I'm SO on the after side of the thirties!  Dunno what I was thinking.).  Anyway, I got through the sweet little conversation I was having without looking like any more of a dumb blond than I usually do.  Whew!

...for the record, I'm 46 now...and by "record" I mean I may be referring to this blog in case I forget again.

Thanks for "liking" my blog posts!!

A "Boo" Beating

So there I was, sitting all innocently in my car waiting in the middle school parking lot for my little guy to be dismissed from band sectionals.  And I sat, and I sat, and I sat.  Until...I caught a glimpse of the little dude rounding the corner and heading toward my car.  He got closer and closer, and then he suddenly changed his trajectory, rounding behind my car and along the driver's side.  He slowed his pace, assumed his scariest zombie-arms-in-the-air-accompanied-by-a-hideous-face look he could muster.  He got right to my window and I put my arms up, put on my scariest face, and, yes...I scared the living crud outa the kid.  Oh, yes I did!!!


Little guy:  As he got in the car, post terrifying moment, "You're stupid, mom."


Yeah, well, mama's feeling mighty smart and clever right about now, darlin'!

Thanks for "liking" my blog posts!!

Fake it Till you Maybe Make it

I'm fashion challenged.  Of this there is absolutely no doubt, I'm sure.  Well, tonight I stepped out of my comfort range.  Mind you, this means I didn't wear jeans/boots/lady cut T-shirt or cutoffs/tank top/flip flops.  My comfort range is quite tiny, indeed.

Anyway, I wore a maxi dress with BIG flowers all over it.  I'm sure it's out of style because I picked it up at a thrift shop and then let it sit in my closet for a year.  And, to complicate things, this particular maxi dress had built in boobs.  Yup, fake chi-chis.  While I thought, "Hey, great!" when I got it, the actual implementation of said chi-chis was somewhat awkward...particularly as I invited them to join me at a party I attended all afternoon.  And they were not particularly good guests...always complaining when I bumped them into things, always wondering if they were passing as "real", and sometimes even threatening to fold in upon themselves.

Yeesh!  Thinking this dress (and its appendages) may be finding its way back to a thrift store....

Thanks for "liking" my blog posts!!

Childhood Memories

I was gazing at my oldest son this morning.  The guy has somehow managed to grow into a giant...right before our eyes...right under over our noses.  He now towers over both me and Dave.


Me:  "Do you remember being little?"

Big guy:  "You mean like dad?"


OK, that was awesome.  Seriously huge funny points go to the kid for coming up with that so fast.


But then later that afternoon, as I'm pretty much never apt to simply let something go, I had to dig a little deeper.


Me:  "So really, do you remember being little?

Big guy:  "Yes."

Me:  "Were you happy?"

Big guy:  "Yes."

Me:  "Did you have fun?"

Big guy:  "Yes."

Me:  "Good."


Thinking this years later confirmation cancels out all those times he told us he hated us and we were the worst parents ever.  I'm good with that.

Thanks for "liking" my blog posts!!

Crunchy Goodness

You know how you know when your husband's supportive of your eating habits?  Well, I sure do.  All it takes is reading one of his emails to a friend of his.  Something along the lines of "Kali eats like a bird.  She's easier to please food-wise than I am.  Usually I just put her out in the back yard for a while and she comes back in full."

Did I sneak a peek at his computer when he wasn't looking?  No way!  Nope, that guy proudly read the email to me...I mean seriously proudly...beaming and such.  "That's some funny stuff!!" he proclaimed.

And, well, darn it, the dude has me there.  It is funny.  And true.  And, by golly, that dandelion in the corner by the gate sure looks yummy!

Thanks for "liking" my blog posts!!

Give that Lady a Hand

Mosquito season is officially here.  How do I know?  Well, there was one all the way in the school, all the way in the teacher workroom, and then all the way in the staff bathroom.  That's a lot of traveling for a little bugger.

Anyway, I went into the bathroom and spied that little blood sucker right away.  I raised my hands in my "smack the crud out of it" position and...for just a moment...just the tiniest of seconds...and the next couple of minutes played like a movie in my head.  You see, the thing is, I never, EVER, manage to smack a mosquito on my first try.  Rarely even on my second, or third, or fourth...but I am persistent, so I pretty much always do eventually get it. 

So, here's how my couple minute movie went.


Kali enters the teacher bathroom.

Many other teachers and staff all of a sudden feel the need to go to the teacher workroom for a myriad of reasons.

A long series of claps can be heard from the bathroom.

Kali walks out to see a room full of co-workers staring at her...now officially known as "that teacher who applauds when she pees."


Yup, it would so happen!

...and that particular mosquito lived to see another day.

Thanks for "liking" my blog posts!!

Catching some Zs

Last night I was startled awake by Dave's snoring.  He denies that he does it, but, by golly, the dude is a serious snorer from time to time.  And last night was one such time.  Now, I certainly don't hold it against him.  I know that when someone is asleep they're totally not responsible for things their bodies do.  I remind Dave of this every time he complains about what I...um...er...do in my sleep.

So, while yes, I was startled awake, I had not a hint of anger or grumpiness.  I figured this was my chance to catch those elusive Zs on tape.  Or film.  Or whatever my iPhone has in it.  Anyway, I stealthfully reached for my phone, pulled it under the covers, turned it to silent, got the video mode set, slowly moved it out from under the quilt, prepared to press "record"...and the freakin' snoring stopped!!!  Yeesh!  OK, now I was a little grumpy.  But not much.

Next time Zs, next time....

Thanks for "liking" my blog posts!!